How to brush a toddler’s teeth without a fight

Surviving the toddler teeth brushing struggle.

Why do toddlers resist having their teeth brushed?

Well really it’s not the most fun thing to do. I can understand why toddlers don’t want to brush their teeth. It is just another mundane task. They don’t understand the importance and can’t comprehend long term consequences like toothaches or having to get fillings.

Toddler’s also like to rebel and assert their independence. How fun for us parents! Refusing to have their teeth brushed can be another act of defiance. Alternatively, they may be ok with brushing their own teeth but if they’re going through a phase of wanting to do everything themselves, will not let an adult brush their teeth properly.

Brushing teeth can also be a bit uncomfortable if the toothbrush isn’t right. Hard bristles or a toothbrush head that is too large can cause discomfort which will put kids off brushing teeth. I also know that I feel vulnerable having my mouth open and someone poking around in there at the dentist so toddlers are likely to feel the same way.

When should you brush a toddler’s teeth?

All the recommendations say that teeth need to be cleaned twice a day from when the first tooth erupts. Initially this may just be wiping with a damp cloth.

I think we started trying to brush with a toothbrush from 12-18 months. I must admit it was pretty sporadic at first though. Now we have built teeth brushing into our nightly routine but are still working on getting it done in the mornings which are so rushed.

Also keep in mind that children need an adult to help brush their teeth until they’re at least six years old. Even if they seem like they are brushing their teeth well, young kids just don’t have the control and skills to properly brush all their teeth until at least six.

When should I take my toddler to the dentist?

Dentists advise that you take your child to the dentist from 12 months or age, both to check on their teeth and get them used to the procedure.

I had ‘visiting the dentist’ on my to-do list for ages. I’m not sure if I ever would’ve got around to it except my daughter knocked a tooth loose. Apart from the trauma of having to get the tooth pulled out, I’m glad we ended up at the dentist because now they follow up with me about appointments so I don’t have to remember myself.

It is very reassuring going to the dentist and being told that your child’s teeth are healthy. Especially when we don’t follow all the recommendations perfectly. With my daughter, we got confirmation that her teeth were all healthy and which ones needed to be flossed regularly. My son’s first check showed that he had some demineralisation so were prone to decay and we would need to do a really good job of brushing. Lots of valuable information. 

I highly recommend seeing a paediatric dentist. They are set up perfectly to make sure that the visit runs smoothly. They know exactly how to position the child on a parents lap to make them comfortable, know how to talk to the child and nervous parents and are likely to have stickers, character toothbrushes or other goodies for the kids to take home.

We know that we need to brush our toddler’s teeth, but how? If your child forces their mouth shut, do you just shove a toothbrush in anyway? Well sometimes I do that if I have to but there are much easier ways!

How to brush toddler’s teeth without a fight

1. Children’s teeth brushing apps

These teeth brushing apps have been my savior! My kids don’t get a lot of screen time so they really love these. Two minutes of watching their favourite characters while we brush up, down and all around.

We started out with The Wiggles teeth brushing app. They sing a song about brushing teeth that goes for two minutes and show other children brushing their teeth. The kids are encouraged to spit out their toothpaste which is great because that can be struggle and then they earn a ‘sticker’ (picture) for each time they brush their teeth. Watch the song and video below.

Oral B Magic Timer has also been popular in our house because it has Disney characters. The screen looks like it is covered in foamy toothpaste and then for two minutes a toothbrush clears it away to reveal a picture underneath. Again this picture gets collected in a sticker book.

Oral B Magic Timer only comes with Minnie Mouse and Mickey Mouse characters unlocked. To unlock other characters, you have to buy their products and scan the barcode. At least that’s the official process. Check out this Reddit post on how to unlock most of the Disney Magic Timer characters for free.

2. Choose the right time

I find that there is about a 20 minute window when I can safely brush my kids teeth at night. If they’re too tired, it’s not going to happen. Too early and they are likely to ask for more food afterwards.

Brushing teeth is usually the last thing we do before reading books at bedtime. To make sure they’re not feeling hungry, I offer my kids milk before they brush their teeth to fill their tummies and maybe a banana if they didn’t eat much dinner earlier (which with toddlers is frequently!).

Chronicles of a Momtessorian explains how creating a routine can help with brushing your child’s teeth and has a printable schedule to follow.

3. Use the right toothbrush

Dentists recommend a soft bristled toothbrush for your toddler’s teeth. This will be much gentler on their gums.

Also make sure that you use a toothbrush intended for a child with a small head. Trying to be eco-friendly, I bought bamboo kids toothbrushes but it was still too large for my two year old and was uncomfortable for him. Toothbrushes are usually labelled with age ranges to help you choose.

4. Experiment with toothpaste flavours

Just like adults, kids will have a preference for toothpaste flavours. Try a few until you find one that they like. Be wary of limited addition flavours though as once they’re used to a certain taste it may be hard to change if no longer available.

Jack and Jill have some awesome flavour variations aside from the standard mint and bubblegum. Try Berries and Cream, Milkshake or Blackcurrant.

And until you find that perfect flavour, just brush with water. It’s better than nothing and will get them used to the brushing process before adding a weird flavour.

5. Buy fun brushes and paste

Try buying toothbrushes or toothpaste with your toddler’s favourite character on it. That’s always a sure fire way to get kids interested and marketing departments everywhere know it! Or if they are going through a unicorn or dinosaur phase, you can check out Jack and Jill biodegradable toothbrushes.

6. Let the kids brush themselves

It really is important that adults brush a kids teeth until they’re at least six. But that doesn’t mean the kids can’t do some of their own brushing too. They need to learn and practice after all.

It will also let the kids be independent. It gives my son satisfaction that he gets to decide when to hand the toothbrush over to me.

7. Both hold the brush

This is something I’ve just started to do recently. When my son simply refuses to give up the toothbrush, I suggest that we brush together meaning that we both hold it at the same time. It means I get to control the brushing and do it properly but he also feels in control. It is also a great way for him to feel exactly how to hold it and get to understand the motion required.

8. Brush your teeth at the same time

Monkey see, monkey do. For two reasons, I rarely brush my teeth at the same time as my toddlers. Firstly, I’m usually focused on making sure they are brushing and then I am doing it for them but also I usually plan to eat snacks after they are in bed. Brushing my teeth at the same time allows them to see exactly how I do it and it is fun to do it together. Plus it stops me snacking later. Win-win!

9. Brush in front of the mirror

Kids love to look at themselves in the mirror. Get a step stool tall enough that kids can see themselves brushing their teeth above the sink. My daughter spends more time preening and pulling faces than she does brushing but at least there is some brushing in there.

10. Offer lots of praise

Congratulate your toddler throughout. Try variations of the following:

• Wow, you are opening your mouth so wide!
• That is so helpful opening up for me to brush
• Great spitting!
• I can see you’re brushing all the way up the back – good job!
• Thanks for letting me brush your teeth
• Oh my goodness those are such shiny white teeth!
• Mmm your mouth smells so clean!

11. Brush a bath toys teeth

Role playing with toys is a great way to disarm toddlers that are feeling defiant. You can start by brushing a bath toys teeth to show your child and then ask if your toddler wants to help. Or you can try saying “Turtle is a bit nervous about having her teeth cleaned. Can you show her how easy it is?”

12. Tickle brush

I usually only bring this one out when I’m desperate and I’m facing a grumpy toddler with their mouth clamped firmly shut. Sit them on your lap and with their head rested on your elbow, reach around with the same hand and tickle them. Shove a toothbrush into the open giggling mouth with the other hand. This is likely to only be a very quick brush but at least I can get a brief clean done.

Taking the stress out of getting your toddlers teeth clean

I hope one or some of these ideas work for you. If your kids are anything like mine, you’ll need every one of them in your arsenal! And rest assured, you need not be perfect with teeth brushing. My kids usually only have their teeth brushed once a day, occasionally only for 10 sec (if I’m already exhausted once a bristle has crossed each tooth) and their teeth are still healthy. The dentist says so.

If any of these ideas is the silver bullet for you or you have another trick up your sleeve to get your toddler cooperating at teeth time, please share in the comments. I’d love to hear from you 🙂

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Image credits:

• confidentdentalcare from Pixabay
• Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels
• Jenny Friedrichs from Pixabay